Thursday, May 17, 2012

I Changed My Mind. I'm Not Moving.

I have spent hours of my life in the recent past perusing apartment and house listings to find a new home in New York that might meet all the criteria on the wish list.  I have looked at countless photos and read endless descriptions.  Which leads me to conclude that people are batshit crazy.  Do people not understand that the point of posting these photos is to induce someone to want to live in that space?  I am unclear as to how this is unclear. 

Let's review some, keeping in mind that the point, the entire and only point, of these photos is to entice a fellow human being to pay money to live in these houses.  Let's also keep in mind that every single one of these photos is attached to a listing that was posted by a realtor.  A professional person.  Someone is getting paid for this level of quality.  I cannot stress that enough.

Here's a pro tip: clean the toilet.  Then take the picture.  The brush is right there.
 I call this series "this house has walls (and doors)!"
These houses can hold stuff.  Lots and lots and lots and lots of stuff.  Since we're not going to de-clutter before taking pictures of our home, let's at least be sure we document all the stuff. 
 These houses have towel bars!  Behold the towel bars!
You know how sometimes you want a fireplace but without the place for the fire?
 And lastly, I don't even know.  


SG said...

Hahaha, very classy places. I really like the...Christmas tree?