Thursday, September 13, 2012

It's So Nice To Know the Possibility for Humiliation Follows You Well Into Adulthood

One day when I was in middle school, before she drove us to school, my mom wanted us to try this new supplement shake she had bought for us.  She mixed it up and handed a big glass to my little brother and I.  It tasted fine and I drank the whole thing.  It was citrus-y, with a little of that vitamin aftertaste.  I was okay for a little bit but then it started to feel like my stomach was quite unhappy with this new development.  We walked out to the car and I became increasingly unsure of what my mother had just given me.  I proceeded to throw it all up in the grass by the driveway.  And so began my uneasy relationship with supplements or boosters or anything falling into that general category.

I've tried them at juice bars or smoothie chains and even when they don't make me retch, my stomach likes to make it known that it is not pleased with me.  Usually those things are filled with several ingredients so it's hard for me to identify the exact culprit.  As a general rule, I stay away.

However, yesterday I was at Starbucks during my lunch break getting my customary iced coffee with soy milk, when I long line gave me time to peruse the juices in the cooler.  I spied one of those green juices that is supposed to be jam packed with wonderful, magical things.  I picked it up and examined the label.  All-natural, 100% juice, no sugar added.  Contains apples, banana, kiwi, mango, pineapple, spirulina, chlorella, broccoli, spinach, blue green algae, garlic, barley grass, wheatgrass, ginger, and parsley.  Sounded okay.  Figured this would be a better afternoon pick me up than more coffee or a pastry so I bought it.  And I slowly sipped it from 2:30 until 3:30.

By 5:30, I was vomiting into a trash can in my office.  Because a job is not really a job until you've thrown up in your office and done the walk of shame out of there clutching your office trash can garbage bag.  I then proceeded to throw up approximately 9 more times between the hours of 6:00 and 11:00.  When my body decides something has to go, chick is thorough.

So I am home today, because I am exhausted, because I haven't had anything to eat since 3:30 yesterday and am still not even a bit hungry, and because my stomach still feels a little unsure about how it feels about life in general.

But since I do believe there is a silver lining to most anything, I think this one probably is that now I know that it is either spirulina, chlorella, blue green algae, or barley grass that my body hates.  All those other things I can eat in their pure form quite successfully.  So maybe no more blue green algae for me.  Also, another bright side: I spent so much time with my face in it last night that I was able to identify some parts of the toilet where we need to clean better.  Silver linings everywhere!


SG said...

Yikes! Thank you for giving me a reason to stay away from healthy stuff. Feel better! xoxo

LWhits said...

Yikes is right! I love those Odwalla drinks and have never had an issue. Any chance it was food poisoning from anything else?

Christina said...

Nothing else I ate that day was out of the ordinary, and I have a history of not being able to tolerate those supplements and boosters, so think it was definitely that. My cousin mixes the same green juice I had in her kids' sippy cups with other juice, so I know they're totally harmless for most. I'm just a weirdo.