Sleep: So Not Overrated

I am a champion sleeper. If there's one thing I do really, really well, it's sleep. I usually fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow and stay blissfully asleep for 9, 10, 12 hours without waking. If I do wake up, all I have to do is roll over, get comfortable, and I'm out again like it's nothing.

Until now. I suppose like any person with a considerable talent, sometimes that talent is blocked. Sometimes the writer is without inspiration, the artist is without a muse, the singer is without a note, and the sleeper is WITHOUT FUCKING SLEEP!

There is no sleep to be had lately and other than the two nights I wasn't feeling well so I medicated with some PM cold medicine, I have been lying awake staring at the ceiling. There is no reason for this. I'm not stressed, I'm not anxious, I'm not unwell. The last two nights I've probably gotten about 4 hours total. TOTAL. Somebody please hit me upside the head with a brick, I need to sleeeeeeeeeep.

I just want to put Sleep on notice: you can't run, you can't hide, I will track you down and I will have my way with you. Just kidding, Sleep. Please come back, I miss you. We had such good times. I promise to be less needy. Maybe not take you so much for granted. Just come over tonight, say around 11:00? Please. For the love of Christ and all that is holy, please.