Nutty for Coconut

I LOVE coconut. That's the first thing you should know about me. There is nothing better than coconut. Coconut flavored anything. Coconut and chocolate? Delicious. Coconut and and rum? Fantastic. Coconut and shrimp? Sublime. Is anything on the planet more diverse and wondrous than coconut? The answer is no. So imagine how close I came to pooping my pants when I discovered this:

I get to have the magnificent taste of coconut on my lips all day long. This is fricken-fracken fantastic! My life is considerably better now. I just thought you should know.

Also, while we're discussing flavors. I like bananas but do NOT like banana flavored anything. I also like raisins but do NOT like raisins added to anything, especially not in cookies. Raisins do not belong in cookies. Chocolate chips belong in cookies. Make a note.

And lastly, fruit does not belong in desserts. You are ruining my chocolate cake by insulting it with the presence of any kind of fruit or fruit-like product. Do not do this. Also, fruit by itself is not a dessert. Sorry. To call fruit a dessert or to consider fruit a dessert is to insult me and everything for which I stand.

These are the kind of hot button issues I plan to address with this blog. You're welcome, society.