The Future

Oh, right. This. I suppose something had to fall through the cracks. Other things that fell through the cracks? Going to the gym, studying and putting away laundry. What did not fall through the cracks? Sleeping, watching TV and physically attending class/work/internship. Priorities. Like today, one of my classes got cancelled, so I was done for the day at 12:30. I went home to get lunch and thought about all I could accomplish today: wash my car, go to the gym, go to the grocery store, study, send out more applications for summer internships, sweep the hardwood floors. I got home and swept the floors. Then I put on my pajamas. Big mistake.

Do you ever imagine the future and have a vision of your ultimate self? Like in my future, I see me being a morning person, getting a lot done in a day, being very stylish at all times, having a clean house and car, going to bed early, and being at all times fabulous. I am not/do not do these things now, but somehow I figure I will be those things/do those things in my real life. Which I suppose requires me to explain that I don't think of right now as real life. This is just the waiting period, the preparing time, before real life starts. That doesn't really make any sense. It sounds a lot more reasonable in my head. A lot of things make a ton more sense up there. You should come visit. The wonders you will see!

Something about this time of year makes me start thinking about the future. I think because it's so cozy and beautiful out and it makes me crave freshly baked treats and warm blankets. Then I start thinking about the holidays and that always makes me think about family. Then that leads to thinking about the family yet to be that I will create someday and the life I will be living then and the person I want to be. The bad habits I hope to have conquered and the good things I hope I don't forget. It's like me now vs. future me. I think me now is pretty great, but future me is totally awesome. That woman gets shit done. She's very impressive. I don't exactly know when I will cross the line from me now into future me, but I think I have to graduate law school and put some ducks in a row first. Then it'll just kind of happen. I'm pretty sure.

I suppose I could start thinking of right now as real life. Start living the life I want. Try harder to be the person I envision. Maybe at least get the ducks ready to line up. That would be the smart thing to do.