Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Finally, Someone Complaining About Real Problems

When I was around 14 years old, my formerly pristine and milky complexion erupted into a splattering of ugly red bumps. It kind of looked like a globe owned by a frequent world-traveler who had marked everywhere he had been with a red pushpin. My face looked like a well-traveled, red pushpin covered globe. It was unfortunate, but luckily I went to an all-girls high school so the impact on my social life was minimal. My dad finally decided to take pity and bought me some Proactiv. I diligently began to use it and my face cleared up considerably. My complexion never quite regained its former purity, but things were much improved.

I kept using the Proactiv without fail until my senior year of college. My reasons for quitting were threefold: 1) It's expensive. It cost about $45 every 6-7 weeks. 2) I started using it when I was 14 and I was 22 now. I was a grown up. Surely all my hormonal, pubescent skin problems were behind me. 3) Proactiv can't be the only thing out there that works. There has to be something else on the market that is cheaper and just as effective. I determined to go off the Proactiv and experiment with other products.

Within weeks, my face had a wicked case of chicken pox. The symptoms were similar to Traveling Globe Syndrome (TGS). It was unfortunate, but luckily I had a steady boyfriend so the impact on my social life was minimal. I was still determined to find something else that worked. Nothing did. It all sucked. And as a result, I look like I have chicken pox in all my college graduation pictures. I went back on Proactiv shortly thereafter. The moral of this story? Don't try new things.

So now I have a new problem. The Proactiv which has not failed me for the last 11 years is now drying out my skin so badly that it is flaking off my skull, reminiscent of leprosy. I am in the uncomfortable and unenviable position of choosing between chicken pox or leprosy. As diseases go, chicken pox is probably more desireable. It's temporary and there's less of a stigma whereas I think leprosy is permanent and you have to live in a colony. I hate moving. But along with the flakiness, comes skin so dry and tight that sometimes when I wake up it hurts to even blink. I can't decide which difiguring disease to err towards embodying. Thus far, my solution has been to only use the Proactiv once a day, before I go to bed. In the mornings, I use something a little gentler. As a result, I'm breaking out slightly more but I can blink comfortably. Oy, choices.

So, in closing, Dear Proactiv, I have been a loyal customer for 11 years. I, and I imagine many of your initial customers, are aging rapidly. Our skin is changing and just straight acne fighting ingredients will no longer cut it. I need a product suitable for my changing, aging, more sensitive skin. Get on this ASAP, because I prefer to not be a walking poster child for diseases I do not have. Thank you for your time. Signed, Chicken Leper.

2 comments:

SG said...

Are you using the moisturizer they give you?

Christina said...

Thank you for your concern about this very serious problem, SG. No, I do not use the Proactiv moisturizer because I have used it in the past and did not like it. Plus it comes in a very small container and is expensive. I use either Aveeno sensitive skin or Cetaphil to moisturize.